"God's Little Creatures"

I'd like to tell you a little story this morning. A true story of a battle of epic porportions that has raged on and on for month upon month. A story of victories and defeats...but mostly defeats.

This is a story about ants.

Yes, you heard me correctly. This battle began sometime after the flood of early summer and came to a critical moment this morning around 7:30am. But first, a little background.

We're leaving this afternoon to go visit my dearest friend, Shelby. She just finished Dental school a few months ago (she assured me I wouldn't have to refer to her as "Doctor" all the time), then went through officer training last month and is now stationed at the Airforce base in Biloxi, MS with her husband. It's still an 8 hour drive, but hey, it's closer than Nebraska!!! I'm SO excited to spend the weekend with her :)

Except that it means I have a LOT to do today. Like packing, cleaning, running a few errands, and figuring out what all is necessary to bring for an 11-month old for 3 days (probably less than I think, right?). So last night, instead of doing a few of those things before bed and helping ourselves out, Dan & I decided to pretend like we weren't grown-ups and stuck in a movie around 9:45, just for kicks. We were in denial, I'm pretty sure.

So this morning, he slept through his alarm. Somehow, mine went off (even though I was pretty sure I had turned it off yesterday), but he was still late getting around. Which meant he couldn't really help out much this morning with a few of those details.

"But I thought this was a story about ants," you say? I'm getting there, I promise.

So as Dan was grabbing his things and running out the door while I was trying to prompt Caroline to EAT (as always), he kicked the diaper bag and exposed a busy little pile of our favorite friends. He came over and gave us each a kiss, and said in his sweetest voice:

"Ummm....I'm really sorry, but there are ants all over in the corner by the diaper bag." Then, sensing my rapidly growing rage, he added, "Don't get frustrated. Just think of them as God's little creatures!"

And then he promptly ran out the front door.

Seriously?!?! God's little creatures?!? Because I'm pretty sure they're the spawn of Satan himself, sent for the single purpose of making me LOSE.MY.MIND!!!!!!!

I finished feeding Caroline and put her to bed. Then I attacked with ant spray. Then I cleaned up the ant spray with paper towels. Then I vacumed up the dead ants. Then I cleaned the area with Lysol. Then I swept the rest of my floors (AGAIN) and mopped the entire thing (AGAIN). I think they punish me for being lazy and watching a movie instead of sweeping -- they know things. But I'm pretty sure they don't really even prefer a dirty floor to a clean one. Which is even more maddening because it means I'm really not in control of this war.

But right now I'm making myself feel better by enjoying a freshly mopped floor and a cold cup of coffee, and praying that Caroline's nap lasts a little longer so I can actually take a shower and start packing.

I won the battle this morning. But I have a pretty good feeling that this war is not over.